Lady, why are you drawing pictures for fictional people’s birthdays on the internet when you could be doing any of the number of things that I think would be wiser for your situation

I’m glad you asked that, potentially real person asking that question on the outside instead of just the anxiety ridden one in my head!

It’s because I mostly don’t know what else to do! And so far I have been floating through 2022 on the gifts of people who have liked and purchased the stuff I put on the internet. Somewhat in my brain it makes sense to just shove myself in front of those people as often as possible with the nicest things that I can conjure at the moment, in hopes of being worth continued sustaining.

I’m going to have to get some stuff drawn up in advance here because next week is

31st - Judai Yuki birthday

1st - my birthday, Johnny C’s birthday, start of a VRAINS month?!

2nd - Ryou Bakura, my very favorite Yu-Gi-Oh gremlin’s birthday

Check in for the big queer zine is later in the month thankfully.

I think it’s going to feel super good to draw Johnny though and maybe that’s where I’ll start haha

Found Vector’s coat in doll form online and it is challenging not to purchase it

I want to make a doll of that troll haired motherfucker so bad

Also mighty fuck

I swear I’m not having like a stroke on Main all the time I just use voice to text a lot and it doesn’t always capture what I’m trying to say and I don’t always catch when it fucks up

Sometimes I read posts back to myself afterwards and I’m like jeez everyone must think my skull is dented

I promise I can put whole sentences together in real life.

tuulikki:

lesbianfairie-deactivated202212:

(via propheticfire)

I want to be on enough/ the right kind of painkiller that I can just

COMPLETE TASKS

Weird thing that happens to me is like, I love making shit weird and dark and bloody, but sometimes the canon is so much of that that it is kind of the new and different thing to do is make soft.

So I’m in like a weird spot where a lot of people don’t even know me for bleeding neon art and this is sad haha. I want to do both!

I had a feeling recently of wanting to do a bunch of redesigns of characters from yugioh zexal of all things? A lot of things about the designs on that show were so close but I was not satisfied haha. And that has kind of given me a refocus in general when working with fanwork, like, “just draw this thing like it is something you made up.” I think that will help me feel more authentic about what I’m making. I really like making things that look like canon, I like making things that are recognizable but less, uh aNgLeS? Things that go too far don’t appeal to me generally, but I think I can go further.

I think this is several thoughts all braided together! But it’s something I wanted to chat about.

I don’t know why I am feeling all this kind of stuff now, but I hope you guys are enjoying watching it happening haha

scarysigns:

imreadydollparts:

I have been OVERspending lately, and buying far too many ponies for myself.

My birthday is in November, and I’d been seeing these G1 mail order Birthflower ponies here and there. They tend to run a little high for me (and I did pay more than I’d like to have for this one), and I was trying to resist buying one since I only wanted her because she has my month’s flower.

I especially didn’t like how all of the non-alternate birthflower ponies were identical (Heart Throb pink hair, white body, lavender eyes) with different, one-color cutie marks.

So. Boring.

Then this one popped up with a not great but reasonable BIN and I told myself I might as well so I’d stop thinking about it.

Usually I will restore a pony if they’re in a good state for it, and this Chrysanthemum’s hair was fine if needing a little care. Restoring it would be easy but I decided to do a full, alternate rehair instead. A personal custom job just for myself.

I also opted to NOT restore her body from ivory to white. Ivory would work perfectly with the color scheme I wanted to use.

I picked out some fall colors for her and painted over one of the mums. I was struggling with the paint and my hands at the time, so I stopped after finishing one side. I took inspiration from the alternate November Birthflower Pony which is a pink body, pink hair, blue eyes, and two color green and yellow mums.

Then I also gave her All the Leaves are Brown eyes.

Personally my eyes are blue, and I did consider giving her blue eyes like mine but let’s be honest:  There are MORE than enough blue-eyed ponies and dolls out there already.

To be honest I’m very happy with how she turned out.

I also felt less bad about having changed a pony that might have been restorable because I kept finding more and more little pink and brown spots on her body (vinyl degradation), so she never would have been perfectly minty again anyway.