I’m thankful that this was a trip designed for new employees, so I’ll never have to do it again, because holy balls, that was some pure concentrated awful. 

The training itself, not a big deal, but the ride there and back was some protracted torture.  If it wasn’t a screaming match, it was the ugliest backwoods attitudes about everything being shouted around the car (outrage, for example, at the potential for being faced with serious repercussions for using a racial slur) with this weird assumption that everyone in the car agreed.   They screamed over me to keep yelling like harpies about their ideas when I even casually suggested that it might be otherwise for some people and that maybe non-Christians and breastfeeding women and gay people aren’t just ‘looking for a reason to complain.’   It must be nice where you’re sitting, ladies.

I learned that T carries a gun and that everything must be about her.  I got to talk for five minutes on the way home before she wrenched the conversation back to her and her fucking boyfriend or her fucking dad again.

fuck her, and her boyfriend, and her dad

with a cactus

I heard about every god damn thing they ever did, and everything she’s ever eaten, for FOUR FUCKING HOURS.   She talks about nothing but her dad, her boyfriend, food, and cars.   At least at work I can pretend to be busy and not talk to her, but here I was literally trapped.  

I found this woman only mildly and incidentally annoying before this week.  

Tonight I am kind of homicidal. 

AND ON THE WAY IN, I DROPPED MY FUCKING INDIAN LEFTOVERS ON THE SIDEWALK. I WAS ABLE TO SALVAGE SOME THAT DIDN’T FALL OUT OF THE CONTAINER, BUT I LITERALLY FELL TO MY KNEES AND YELLED 'NO NO NO NO NOOOO’ AT THE SKY LIKE I WAS IN A FUCKING MOVIE, I JUST COULD NOT 

MotherFUCKER. 

I want to call off work tomorrow so badly, but I’ll never have the guts to and I know the other two will be thinking it, so at least one of us should drag our sorry carcas over there.

Shut
The
Fuck
Up

Well, training is over. It was long and unnecessary and I know that I still have to tell my supervisor that all this shit went down and sit next to T for the rest of my time st this job.

In the car again, and I feel like I’m the only one feeling anxious about it. The whole car is talking about dogs and boyfriends, and I have not had either of those things since 2004, so I’m just sitting in silence. Whatever~

Wow, this training is long as hell.

T seems relatively cool with A now, though we are all still trying to get out of having to go back with her again. We’re so distracted thinking about how much were going to have deal with her going back that this training stuff is pretty much just background noise.

Had weird conversation with A over lunch about being bi, and she said being bi must be very interesting and asked if I had a preference. T heard part of the story of what my ex did to me st the end and made a ‘mrow’ sort of catty noise. This girl’s internalized misogyny is really irritating on a daily basis, but now I’m especially irritated.