I’m really getting better at the ‘make things you like, even if you show them to no one’ thing! I’ve never been able to do that before, I always still had my mental shame passenger saying that people would still know that I made something stupid, or something sweet, or something that revealed too much, or some trope I’d been told was embarrassing and awful. And yet I did little things weekend with the most minimal of hang ups and I woke up this morning just boggling at how much stuff I suddenly felt free to make. Like I honestly sat back and felt a kind of wonder that so many things could just exist, that I could make them. For the first time in all the life I can remember, I made things without the feeling that someone inside my head was telling me it was all wrong and awful and I should be ashamed and definitely stop.

I think this was a combo of all the asexuality and fandom interaction, plus my homicides stuff, but Wow, this is really something.