“I’ve interviewed more than 50 people who have estranged themselves from family members, and I have yet to meet a single one who regrets it. They regret whatever situation made it necessary. They regret not having a parent/sibling/family member they could come to terms with. They regret that their problems were severe enough to make estrangement look good. But they don’t regret doing it.
“More than three-quarters of the participants in one study felt estrangement had made a positive difference in their lives. One woman I talked to who initiated an estrangement said her main feeling was relief, even liberation. Another told me it was as though she’d lived under a cloak of silence that had suddenly been lifted. A third said, ‘There really are cases where estrangement is the better course. It’s horrific, it’s sad, it’s tragic, and it’s better than the alternative.’”
TBH one of the BEST sites I’ve been to that talks about parental estrangement is the same one that helped me leave my abusive ex and recognise what was happening… when everyone around me was telling me that the abuse was MY fault.
http://www.issendai.com/psychology/estrangement/adult-childrens-reasons-for-estrangement.html
ALSO warning for fucking EVERYTHING. ::sighs:: The reasons we decide to never talk to someone again, or to severely limit contact with family members are varied, but they’re ALL valid. The parents are often fucking delusional about the situation. The dynamics between abusive parents and abusive lovers are actually not different at all.
(via love-lays-bleeding)
