As someone who has recently started treatment for ADHD after literal decades of the stuff on that list (like, everything but substance dependency), do yourselves all the favors and look into it. Also, lighten up on yourselves, because this has nothing to do with inadequacy or failure.
Not even a little bit.
…these are all seriously signs of ADHD?
You’re kidding
If you are an adult who identifies with the concept of Gifted Kid Syndrome and:
- You have an unusually intense reaction to the concept of rejection, whether personal, professional, or academic
- You have consistent trouble meeting deadlines
- You have big dreams and ambitions that are completely achievable, but you consistently can’t take steps toward achieving them and you don’t know why
- You procrastinate, like a lot
- You like video games, like a lot
- You switch seemingly at random between binge watching your favorite shows for absurd lengths of time or not being able to sit down and focus on them unless you’re doing something else at the same time
- You cannot for the life of you keep your living area clean and organized
- You struggle with substance dependencies, whether with alcohol, tobacco, weed, harder drugs, or even just caffeine
- You struggle with texting/calling/emailing back, even for people you care about deeply and/or even for important deadlines
Please, please, please consider seeking out an ADHD evaluation.
I’m not a psychiatrist or any kind of a medical professional, but personally I can’t help but notice how many elements of what I was perceiving as personal failures before my diagnosis stem directly from my executive dysfunction. Meds and an adequate support system can make a world of difference!
Just some advice from your friendly neighborhood nonbinary-mom-friend blogger!
This is not an exhaustive list of behaviors that can result from ADHD, nor do you have to exhibit every single one all of the time in order to potentially have it. It’s important to understand that symptoms can result in different behaviors in different people.
The key elements to look for is what underlying symptom is driving the resulting behavior, to a degree that is affecting your ability to not just function, but thrive:
- Marked inability or difficulty in controlling what you focus your attention on, resulting in behaviors such as:
- Missing instructions or part of conversations due to distractions (external or internal)
- Reading new, challenging, or uninteresting material and having no idea what the last several paragraphs or sentences just said.
- Difficulty pulling your focus away from something you’re hyper focused on whether you’re aware you need to stop or not.
- Dwelling on “stimulating” emotions or perceived offenses, i.e. trouble letting things go.
- (related to above) Having an “interest-based” nervous system
- meaning you can’t concentrate on something that is not interesting, stimulating, immediately rewarding, or in some way challenging regardless of how “important” it is to you or others.
- If your required work is not interesting to you, you become very sleepy no matter how much sleep you’ve gotten.
- being distracted by everything around you during “boring” meetings or “boring” projects and struggling to stay on task
- Fidgeting, tapping, bouncing, or other physical stimulation making up for your lack of interest.
- Delayed gratification is not a good enough motivator, even when you know it should be (payment upon completion, driving somewhere to get ice cream, the satisfaction of a job well done, etc.)
- If you’ve read this far you’re probably just skimming by now.
- (related to above) Seeking out/preferring instant gratification to make up for the baseline “low stimulation” your brain has at rest.
- snacking, video games, drinking, drugs, anything that is immediately satisfying and low effort.
- (related to above) Trouble organizing your environment, thoughts, or what order tasks should be completed in resulting in behaviors such as:
- Cluttered work or living space
- Difficulty focusing on one thought at a time long enough to act on it before it’s replaced by a different thought (I liken this to a wall of TVs being on at varying volumes, constantly switching to new channels, or a room full of 4 year olds yelling for your attention)
- Feeling overwhelmed or confused by new or challenging tasks that require too many steps and feeling unable to figure out where to begin or how.
- Marked trouble retaining new information or remembering things, causing things like:
- Forgetting what you just read despite having few distractions
- Needing people to slow down and give you information in smaller chunks
- Unable to explain a story you just read/watched even though you were enjoying yourself at the time
- Forgetting a task, name, or number within seconds or minutes of hearing it.
- Reacting impulsively to “stimulating” thoughts or events before you have time to consider your words or actions, resulting in behaviors such as:
- Saying or doing things you regret before you have time to stop yourself.
- Getting angry, offended, or let down before you’ve had time to process the offense (which then becomes an emotion you can’t remove focus from).
- Challenges with making decisions, especially when too much info or too many selections are presented, resulting in struggles with:
- Selecting from restaurant menus you’re unfamiliar with, or choosing something different from what you normally get.
- Anxiety over making the “correct” choice preventing you from settling.
- Blanking out when choices are presented to you, or immediately forgetting all the options.
- Poor concept of time, meaning:
- Being unaware how long something will take, resulting in procrastination, late work or arrivals
- Vastly overestimating how much time is needed and finishing or arriving way earlier (and probably being surprised every time)
- Thinking 15 minutes is either “nO TIME!!!” or “plenty of time,” and typically being wrong in both cases
- Difficulty starting tasks:
- Wanting to start something but feeling unable to, resulting in procrastination.
- Having too many things you’d like to do, and feeling unable to select which one to do start, and ending up doing none of them (see decision making).
- A troubling intolerance of frustration:
- Seeming to give up easily on tasks that become too difficult and not rewarding enough, leading to a reluctance to learn new skills or failure to follow through on projects
- …resulting in procrastination.
- Difficulty finishing tasks with satisfactory skill:
- Once the interesting parts are done to your satisfaction, finishing and cleaning up the details lose their appeal compared to new ideas.
- Rushing to the end of a project or task so you can finish– i.e. feel rewarded– ASAP, and missing details along the way.
- Feeling, nearly at all times, like there’s something else you need to be doing instead, even when nothing is pressing.
- To start your journey to healthy coping, begin by searching for Psychiatrists in your area who are familiar with diagnosing and managing ADHD. Their websites will typically list their focuses, and often they’ll also know a lot about anxiety disorders as well.
You explain that you’re struggling and why, tell them you’d like to talk about the possibility you may have ADHD and if not what else could possibly be wrong. They will take out a document and ask you how much you feel the following symptoms: and list them off. Ask for clarification and examples if you don’t understand the symptom, because they’ll be very general.
If they agree you could have it, they’ll probably recommend Ritalin or Adderall as a trial, but there are non-stimulant approaches as well. You take it (if it’s a stimulant) for a week, then call and tell them how you feel. You have repeat visits to gauge whether the dosage is okay or if you need to try something else. Once a medication works for you, you’re required to return every 3 months, no exceptions.
If you don’t want medication, you can ask for recommendations for ADHD life coaches or therapists who specialize in the area.
If they disagree with the ADHD assessment, you get them to explore what else could be causing your trouble and what they recommend. If you disagree with them altogether, you find a different pysch and get a second opinion.
(via feltelures)
