I also had a nice time seeing the movie.  

I get worried sometimes that I’m trapped in a weird cycle or something, that I’m just doing Approved Things That Other People Know About And Expect and I’ll be stuck like that like I’m in some cuckoo clock hell and going to see a movie isn’t shocking and deviant or anything, but it felt like a little bit of freedom to just go and not tell anyone I planned on it or anything.  

It’s like the tiniest taste of the feeling of flying to Gallifrey One.   I feel so unconstrained when I just fly somewhere else and go somewhere else because I want to and I can.  Not because I have to or I’m expected or I should but just because.  

There should be nothing holding me back from doing whatever.  I just have this almost constant feeling like something is screaming expectations and shoulds and musts and so much so I don’t get found out as some kind of disconnected creature.  I told my mom this past week I feel so alien here. Everyone is watching and everyone knows I’m not whatever they are.  

Anyway, yeah, enjoyed time at movies.