I’m going back and forth between Grief and feeling like I shouldn’t be that upset because I’m not totally blind and I can still do art and I’ve been operating like this for almost a year

interspersed with Fury that the first practice I went to just ignored what this was for months and I could have just had a sight distortion and not a blob that’s just a scar now

sobbing and then fury and then determination to be an amazing artist despite a scarred retina and then back to sobbing fury

it was supposed to SWANniversary and I reflect about having glitter garbage children for 15 years and make an art for it and I’m just instead thinking that my left eye won’t totally work For The Rest of My Life