You know what, you’re right. For the first like 15 or so years of my life my grandmother’s bathroom was decorated entirely, completely, thoroughly, and excruciatingly in cows. She had things in her bathroom that had no business being in a bathroom just because they were cows. And her bathroom had enough space for a single person to spin themselves in a circle. It got to a point where if you set the toilet seat down too hard a cow figurine from somewhere above the bathtub would Rattle and fall.

And then for a few years she ditched the cows.

This was the calm before the hedgehogs. I cannot stress enough that they were floor to ceiling not only in her bathroom but in every single solitary room in her house. There was not a single surface upon which there wasn’t a hedgehog. At that point in her life she had stopped using the upstairs bathroom in favor of the one in the basement and so the bathtub became storage

FOR MORE HEDGEHOGS

My grandfather on my other side has at last count 117 clocks in his living room, and these people are why I am petrified that I’m out running the designation of being a hoarder as though it is death in the Final Destination franchise.

But I also needed a more functional slow cooker.