Today I learned that my grandmother learned about using and asking about people’s pronouns from my brother, who I taught a few years ago when he called me for advice about what to do

One of the aides at her facility is transitioning but, while it is in early stages, sort of only with residents she feels comfortable with first. Grandmother reported that after she saw the aide post to Facebook that this is what she was doing and that if anyone had a problem to unfriend anf remove themselves from her life. It reminded her of me telling Facebook I was not straight and that anyone who believed I was wrong or sinning or whayever garbage can please just leave, only quality people allowed beyond this point, the exit is on the right. The next day she asked the aide what pronouns she should use and if she should only use them at certain times. The aide was so happy and said she would be delightedand excited if Grandmother would use ‘she/her’.

I think it’s really helping her to have a caring gesture like just being asked and given this simple thing from a woman in her 80s at her job in contrast to the lady’s mother screaming at her that she was committing S-I-N, literally spelling it to her.

hope all that improves for her, but in the meantime she’s excited to buy bath and body works items for Herself for the first time and she and grandmother talk about favorite smells there.