i think the shittiest thing about mental illness is that you can know cognitively that your reactions or fears or emotions are completely illogical or full on Lunatic Territory and that does not make them go away. like, fuck! if i know it’s bullshit why does that not FIX it *starts choking out my neurons*
it’s like. stuff where cbt is ineffective so you’re essentially doing dollar store cbt at yourself and then it doesn’t fucking work because the problem isn’t like. a cognitive distortion, it’s some bizarre deep-rooted animal thing in your brain that is making you crazy. I can say all day long “logically of course not everyone I see on the street is a potential murderer” and believe it and know it’s true and STILL be stupidly hypervigilant because guess who doesn’t believe me? MY DOGSHIT IDIOT AMYGDALA. THATS WHO.
YEHOCJHODYGOFUHOFJGLJCHOCJLHJVBLKV FUCK YOURE RIGHT
