(2) everything he does is “for Cardassia” though his idea of what is right for Cardassia changes and is a really painful internal struggle for him.I can see Julian being able to find what Garak does reprehensible, but not needing to distance in the same way that he might from somebody who lacked or ignored a moral code.

Pasted the second half of your message here for ease of replying!  

I’m glad to read that other people are following those, that is really cool!  I know I’ve got someone who reads them talking to me on dreamwidth and that Mica has made posts about enjoying our spew, but knowing that it’s more than like four people who take enjoyment from this is really rad.

I am also pleased that they have inspired you to comment as well!  I hope you don’t mind these going public for the sake of more discussioning!

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I once read something about Garak saying that he’s not unpredictable if you just let go of thinking in terms of human morality. Once you know where his loyalties lie, his actions stop becoming surprises.  Granted, it takes you several seasons to know enough about him to make this call, but perhaps Bashir learns things the audience doesn’t get to!  

I certainly think Bashir can respect people living by a moral code, even if it is not the same as his own, and that may be part of his ease with Garak.  Though is it tolerance and acceptance to be comfortable with someone with such a different moral center, or just stupid?  On the station, Julian is probably safe, because it is probably alien culture awareness time, good for him.   In a pizza AU if they are ever left alone?  Theoretically, maybe not so safe.  I certainly don’t plan for Garak to ever do him any harm, but objectively, would I eat dinner with someone who ought to be serving some kind of sentence, even if he just likes to make dresses now?  Prooobably not.  

I say this not to refute anything you said, because I think you’re onto something, but just to continue to go after how weird it is that this relationship changes when Garak loses his ridges.

 Maybe Bashir on the station does something much like Sisko and has come to slow terms with not being squeaky Starfleet Clean on the inside.  I’ve always appreciated that being with Garak seems to change Bashir’s perspectives and I wonder often how much it colors his change into someone far less wide-eyed and enthusiastic than he started out as.  

Still, though, I wonder how one sits down and really considers ‘sewing and a history of murder’ and says, ‘Yes, but we’re still friends, even though I make it my business to save lives.’   

Maybe this circular thinking I’ve been doing is why I’m still wrapped up in them as a thing.   I am fascinated by painfully compassionate man himself being fascinated by mysterious and potentially dangerous trickster-esque man.  And then that there’s just as much fascination going on from trickster to compassionate doctor?  Hook, line and sinker, man.   

I love that there can be trust or some kind of understanding at the very least in a situation like that, let alone something that escalates into a romantic thing.  It’s kind of tingly in how it sits in my head, I love it.