Rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written less than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway.

@xenobotanist tagged me! I’m gonna do things I’m working on or haven’t been seen. So it’s like ‘first lines of chunks of things in progress.’ Things I’ve already put out there doesn’t sound super thrilling for anyone to look at, haha I’m afraid 'recent’ is like, 'things I did to keep sane during 2020’ and everything else is 'I worked on this yesterday’ or 'now it’s been too long and it feels awkward to do anything with it’. Friendly tagger, I hope you were not hoping to see anything revolutionary in this collection!

1. No one died when Johnny sang. Crucially, this included Johnny. (I’m Still Here [Remix] - JtHM Two lines, technically, but they are the actual first lines of the whole thing since none of it is published yet!)
2. It’s possible Mollari doesn’t recognize the signs, even after all this. (Sleep - Babylon 5 I never shared this.)
3. An entire room full of dead pharaohs.  (Chapter 3 of Strange Shapes - YuGiOh)
4. They’d arrived at the doors to the conference hall a little overdressed in G’Kar’s opinion, but no number of years on Centauri Prime would reset his barometer for ‘too much.’ (Paperwork - Babylon 5 Also never shared this one. Londo and G'Kar were pandemic panic subjects, I guess.)
5. Julian stands in front of his television holding two DVDs while Garak attempts to find the one rumored comfortable spot on Julian’s secondhand sofa. (Unnamed near-end part of Deep Dish Nine called “The Peanut Butter One” by those who know of it - Deep Dish Nine DS9 AU It’s been a decade I should just let it go, this is hilariously non-recent.)
6. In her defense, she didn’t always know what she was doing. (Original opening line for reISH - JtHM, which might live by itself as something called Meanwhile.)
7. “Are you sure this is wise?  Going out like this with just one guard?” (A final part of Portraits - Babylon 5 which a random forum of people embarrassed and hurt me too much for me to put up!)
8. It could probably have gone better. (JtHM fic of the same name which is not SWAN-verse. Was written for an event that went awry and just kind of chills on my harddrive now.)
9. “Will you get out of my fucking house?!” (Chapter 3 of Blood and Cherry Syrup aka 'Vampire Edgar’ - JtHM which was never posted along with two or three more chapters worth for Various Reasons.)
10. “What are you doing here?!” (Unnamed scraps of ideas of Ai/Yusaku from YuGiOh VRAINS. This is the first line in the document that isn’t a scrawled note.)

This looks like something @tinsnip and @anthropwashere would enjoy doing! I have spent so much time looking all this up that everyone interested in such things should consider themselves among the remaining 8.

When you were young and in school and your class won a contest or sold the fuck out of some hyper expensive candy and festive tins of popcorn, what did you get as a reward?  A pizza party.  

People getting together for movies? “Hey, man, yeah, come over, we’re ordering pizza.”  Yes, there will probably be chips, and maybe even a festive tin of popcorn, but the draw is the pizza, the motivator is the pizza, the pizza is the only thing that is mentioned.

Having a staff meeting, and you want to encourage attendance? Pizza.

I don’t think I have ever been asked in my entire life whether or not I like pizza, only what kind.   And I fucking love pizza.  I literally just ordered some minutes before I began typing this and I ordered one for like four people so I can eat it as leftovers for DAYS.

So maybe what you need to do here is imagine (or reflect on your own experience) that you do not really like pizza and are kind of tired of every event being ~*~*~*~PIZZA~*~*~*~

Because this is kind of what being somewhere on the asexual spectrum is like, and it’s definitely applied in fandom, where I’ve seen porn used as a reward, as an incentive, and to encourage participation.   It’s also often seen as an expected default in certain circles.  

I feel already like I need to get several things out of the way to dive into this:

• I am not shaming your enjoyment of porn.  Fuck knows women get some serious shit for liking anything - if you don’t like porn you’re girly and prudish and childish, if you do, you’re somehow less female and ‘nasty’, virgin or whore dichotomy etc etc, shit is gross.  I’m not about that turning this into that, I’m just relaying some experiences and thoughts I’ve had.  If porn has been a great transformative thing in your life, rad, but the place for that is not here, thanks! 
  
• I’m not complaining.  People make what they make.  This is just stuff I’ve experienced and just some things to think about for a minute or longer. I’m just kind of illustrating the way some things are for me. Everyone is different, etc etc etc.
• I really don’t like being called 'ace’, so if you’re planning to reply to this or reblog it or whatever, please don’t refer to me that way.  I’m not entirely sure I have a label for how I roll, and so I don’t really go into a description of my particular preferences and freakouts, but it’s on the asexual spectrum, so 'asexual’ is fine.  Just please no 'ace.’  I don’t like that as a nickname for asexual in general, but I know some people use it to refer to themselves and really like it, so please just don’t use it to include me.  Thanks.
  

 That said:

Keep reading

While I’m not having fun here, I write things.  Here are edited chunks of some of them.

—-

“What are we seeing?”
“I think I found something we’ll both enjoy.”
“Oh, really?”
“It’s a film about a spy.”
“In which language I don’t speak?”
“Romulan.”
“I knew it. There’s always a catch with you.”
“Well that’s not fair.  I’d say it’s more like ‘usually.’”

——-

“You’re in a good mood. No security problems today?”

“I’m pretty sure there will be sucurity problems even if I surgically add ridges to my face.”

—–

“As for our job, I would like your help in…removing the person responsible.”

“Are you sick in the head?! I’m not some kind of assassin on the side! I’m an engineer!”

“…Remove him from his government position.”

“Oh. Well you could have said so.”

—–

All the description is gone.  You just get dialog.  You can play guess the players or something.  Perhaps also guess the universe.

/fun